Just a few hours away. so ready to see mi nana
My sleep was short-lived because my mom woke me up with the horrible sound of the washing machine and the vacuum. I feel like kicking a puppy. I’d never really do something that terrible, but that’s how badly my nerves are shot right now. I’m not in the mood man. I’m not in the mood. Ugh.
I’ve been up for what seems like forever. I did get some packing done, but I have a lot more to do before I leave on Sunday. Waaahhh. Right now, I’m going to crash until about noon/half past noon and then get up and do something with my day. I want everyone to have a great Saturday.
Good morning :)
I’ll be back in a bit.
I took a huge backseat when it came down to writing poetry. In the last few months, the major poetry/prose that I’ve written has been The Hierarchy of Wants and Reality, The Suicide Plea and the Ten Volume Love Letter. Actually, TVLL took so much of my time. Meanwhile, I’m sitting upon notebooks and notebooks of material. I’m a gifted writer, no lie, but I have this huge fear of how I’m perceived. It’s kind of weird really because I hardly care what people think, but my writing is a touchy subject for me. I’ll get over it though. I’m going to use my vacation to my nana’s in Puerto Rico as inspiration for A LOT of new material.
The poem just posted is some truly old shit- like 2 years old. When I first fell for my ex Marcus. Found it trolling on facebook in my notes. yup. All I can do is laugh now. Womp.
I try and try to find you,
But you’re never there,
I try and try to cry to you,
But you never care,
How I love someone who isn’t there?
I try and try to get over you,
But in my heart you stay,
I try and try to make it end
But all I can do is pretend,
I’m pretending
Always pretending
I pretend to not care that you’re never there,
Even when there’s chaos in my mind,
I pretend you give a shit
That I’m going through this
When it comes to the issues,
You can’t pick and choose,
Deal with this,
Be a man !
Goddamn , this wasn’t the plan!
We were supposed to work,
You and I, but just like on a keyboard
U and I is together but underneath there is a bold JK
Now all I do is cry,
Is this what they meant when they said
“You’ll never forget”
You’ll never forget the one who made it all fall apart,
How can I when he/she’s still in my heart?
How come they don’t tell you
That when it comes to love,
There’s nothing you can do,
That when you fall
There’s a chance you can lose it all,
They only tell you it’s beautiful
That’s a lie !
It isn’t at all
At least not the way I fall
You fall fast and hard,
And it hurts,
And you try to make it stop
But that only makes it worse
You have tears in your eyes
And it doesn’t feel right
But you fall anyway
And to him/her it was just another day
When you’re in love you’re blind, you’re numb
Let’s admit it
You’re stupid, you’re dumb
If it’s for real well that’s fine
My story isn’t that kind
It’s the kind when you lose your mind
If it’s love you want,
Then it’s pain you’ll find….
